I do not make, sell, or traffic in bootleg/recast dolls or any other product.

I do not provide information on where or how to buy them.

Any recast information on this blog is for information purposes only, for identifying recast products on the second hand market.

Sunday, June 16, 2013

Grendel of Trollhalla- The Stuff of Nightmares


Self-depreciating humour is still funny right?

So I've decided I want to learn how to sculpt. I meant to do it years ago and never bothered. Interestingly, my box of sculpy was not only still soft, it's useable. I'm shocked, even if you aren't. I pulled it out and stared at it.

I spent the last three days, pretty much non-stop, researching how to sculpt, watching tutorials, watching how to make bjds, crap like that. It all seemed fairly intuitive.

I'm a decent artist, when I can be bothered to find the time to finish anything or even start new stuff. I haven't really updated my deviant art in a couple years, and I have some neat steampunk stuff of which I'm pretty proud. Yeah. I hate ending sentences with prepositions, and when I get on a kick like that I irritate the hell out of myself…moving on. I can paint a bit, draw, do comic art. I'm learning to draw with a tablet and paint with photoshop, but that doesn't come as naturally as working with my hands so I mostly stare at other people's stuff. I also do face ups, and one of these days I'm going to do a then and now post to make myself feel better about my skill set there.

I went to the local craft store hoping to find the kind of clay we used in my junior high art class or paper clay. They didn't have either, so I left with a bunch of wooden balls and some sculpting tools. (If I don't have the stuff I'll never start. It's why I never took more than one ballet lesson. My mom wouldn't buy me the damn tutu and pointe shoes. I would have stuck with it if she had, I'm certain.) I picked a wooden ball that could fit in my Lorina's head. I figured trying to learn to sculpt on an SD size would be a good idea. It wasn't.

I've sculpted exactly three things in my life:

Thing the first: In sixth grade we visited a ceramic shop. I made a tea pot.
Thing the second: In 8th grade I had to take art. I tried to sculpt a sleeping horse. The teacher politely thought it was a dragon, and tried to help me make it look like a horse. It didn't.
Thing the third: This.

I followed these steps:

1. Make sketch. 

2. Realize sketch is more advanced that current sculpting skill set.

3. Ignore sketch.

4. Cover wooden ball with saran wrap.

5. Realize I've never been able to wrap saran wrap tight, but go ahead anyway.

Kill it. Kill it with fire.
6. Do base layer of clay.

7. Build up clay and mold it as I go into something resembling facial features.

8. realize I have no idea what the hell I'm doing, and keep cutting, adding, molding, and digging.

9. End up with….well this. I have no idea what this even is. 

10. Fire it up and sand it anyway.

11. Paint it.

If I call this an art doll, does that make it okay?

12. It still looks like this…wtf?

So I'm going to keep her around. She's ugly as sin, but by the Nine I made her. She's hopefully the worst to come, and hopefully I can only get better.

No. Just no.
I feel pretty. Sooooo pretty!
I have a new-found respect for sculptors and bjd artists, I truly do. I never thought this would be easy, but I did kind of hope it would be a bit easier than it turned out to be. 

This reinforces my personal view against recasts of artist dolls- I will never, ever buy one or support the idea. [I am well aware of the on-going discussion about bjd companies/artdolls/blah blah. I don't want to discuss it here.]

 I've seen Batchix' videos. She's so funny, talented, inspiring, and hard-working. If I hadn't blown my doll budget on Alberta, I would get a Lagoon to support her. I still might find a way to do that, even if Lagoon doesn't really fit my aesthetic. (I'd support Kaye Wiggs dolls but sweet Muses those things are ugly. No offense.)

So I leave you with this first foray into my sculpting adventures. I hope you'll check out my blog dedicated to these endeavors and other random doll-ness once I actually create it. Oh, and by legit dolls too guys. It keeps them in business. ;)

Thanks for reading and happy collecting! (Oh and uh....sweet dreams.)


  1. No comments on this? People are terrible! This is hilarious, cracked me up xD I love it! Never ever throw her away or get rid of her. Keep her as your muse and inspiration!

    1. I'm glad it made you laugh as much it made me. I keep her within reach any time I need to feel better about myself, LOL. XD


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